When I was 16 I couldn’t wait for my life to start! I hated school, especially because I didn’t have a lot of friends, lots of people called my names and just bullied me. It made me have only one goal, to succeed and get out of high school and one day be myself and have friends, just find my way. Though my life in high school got a little better at sixteen I suddenly had four girlfriends who really liked me. But due to circumstances and me knowledge of French, I failed and had my the year all over again, my friends just moved on and as I was stuck, things just got worse again. So getting out of there stayed the only thing on my mind.
So I’m not that much older jet and I didn’t see myself where I am now, as I never made plans beyond eighteen. I obviously got out of high school, which is a good start. I also wanted to find my way and something I really loved doing. And I guess I haven’t found that yet. I’m studying and I don’t like what I’m doing that much. It’s not too bad, but I wish I could find something which excites me more. In the friend department I’m doing ok, I just like hanging out with people and going out, just having fun or someone to shop with. I am a lucky girl and I stopped feeling so ugly, the name calling remains somewhere in my head and now and then it’s a painful reminder, but due to my friends and boyfriend I started even feeling kind of pretty. It still hurts me, but I can put it aside more easily.
The only regret I have is not being sixteen! I didn’t really enjoy it and I really wish I did. I wanted to grow up and move on, start my life. Now I realize my life had already start, I just didn’t realize it. And you know what else?
Growing up sucks!
So I guess I sometimes compensate for not being a teenager then and kind of rebel to mum and grandmother once in a while. I’m on my way of calming down again, but I really needed to have a little of sixteen.
Where will I be in ten years, or even in five? I don’t have I clue and I don’t care, because I’m not making that mistake again.
I live today and tomorrow may bring whatever it’s going to bring!